


Distance

by Fizzpop_Stenea



Category: Pocket Monsters: Sword & Shield | Pokemon Sword & Shield Versions
Genre: F/M, Forgive Me, Hop's inner angst, M/M, One-sided pining, Oooh I only wrote this cause I was sad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-09
Updated: 2020-12-09
Packaged: 2021-03-10 05:06:59
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,339
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27978573
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fizzpop_Stenea/pseuds/Fizzpop_Stenea
Summary: Ha-HA!I'm sad :3
Relationships: Hop/Masaru | Victor, Hop/Yuuri | Gloria
Comments: 3
Kudos: 20





	Distance

"Wyndon?" The word fell out of Hop's mouth like a bad taste. It slung around in his head like an ill-timed echo, and dropped a heavy and hollow pit into his stomach.

"Yes, Wyndon," And Victor confirmed the worst of his fears with a smile.

 _But that's so far away from Postwick_ , How Hop restrained himself from saying those words aloud, he would never know. _You'll be so far away from me._  


"And _both_ of you are going?"

" _Yes_ , dude, _sheesh_ ," Gloria 'tsk'ed while crossing her arms. "It's like you haven't heard a word I've been saying!"

But the truth was that he'd heard every single word far _too_ clearly. So clearly that he couldn't shake them out of his skull, no matter how many times he tried.

"No! No, no, no---I've been listening, Glor, I promise!" He hastily yelped out, before mentally kicking himself for his lack of grace and poise. "I'm sorry, I... I just don't think I understand...?"

"What don't you understand?" Victor asked, curiosity flashing in his eyes, his voice only soft.

"I thought I explained it pretty well." Gloria's tone, however, was quite the opposite of her brother's. Her voice was as sharp as her pointed gaze. "You already saw us beat Leon in that battle, and well.. As the new champions, I mean... It's not like we have much of a choice, do we?"

Victor only shook his head quietly. Perhaps it was regrets or fear, or something born of uncertainty and sorrow that created the dull spark Hop saw in his eyes. But maybe that was just his own feelings staring him back in the face. Or, perhaps, there had never been anything there at all.

"Our taxi is leaving tomorrow," Victor reminded the taller boy softly. Hop wasn't listening anymore though, just nodding his head, and hoping his smile didn't look as forced as it felt.

Galar was a pretty big region all things considered. Not to mention that a cab ride from Postwick to Wyndon took time and money that Hop simply didn't have.

"Yea, and you better be there to see us off, y'hear?" Added Gloria.

How those two could feel so far away while standing right in front of him, he really didn't know. Maybe it was because he knew there was no easy way to tell his two best friends that he was in love with both of them. He knew there never would be an easy way either.

"Of course! I wouldn't miss it for anything--Sonia won't mind if I'm missing out on work for the two of you!"

Hop was in love with all of Victor's sweetness and care, and with all Gloria's fire and toothy grins. With his lights and her shadows. How the thought of Victor's name alone could bring flutters to his gut. How Gloria's lazy smile made him feel like the only other person in the room, like the only other person on the planet. Simply and truly, Hop was in love with them, as purely as pure could be.

"Good!" Victor all but huffed, hastily tossing his arms around Hop in a hug that ended far too quickly.

The two of them were so distinctly different, yet so similar at the same time. Fire and ice, his sweetness and her spice. Both of the same origin, things that could not exist without the other, but not at all the same. And yet, they both made him feeling the same awful ripping and tearing feeling inside. Neither of them even needed to lay a hand on him, and it still felt like they had Hop by both arms, tugging him back and forth until he was being torn apart. She was the day, he was night. He was a calming winter, and she was summer sunlight.

Both the twin's expressions softened into the same doe-eyed, furrowed-browed looks. Hop swallowed, trying to dispel the feeling of a stone lodged in his throat. These two never managed to make things easy for him.

Gloria offered him a smile of her own, she just, seemed so tense. The shorter twin wrapped her arms around Hop in the perfect mirror of her brother's hug. Hop bit the inside of his cheek, if only to keep the tears from falling.

"Hey," She began in a voice much softer and sweeter than she spoke to any one, or thing, that wasn't her precious, baby Budew. "It's gonna be okay, it's not like we're moving all the way to---to Kanto---or Kalos---or anything like that! We're not even leaving Galar, and we're just a cab ride away if you're going to miss us _that_ badly!"

All her words served to do was prove how unprepared Gloria was for the work they had unknowingly, almost unwillingly taken on by being champions. Hop could take every taxi from Postwick to Wyndon from now until the end of time, and he would still probably never get to see them. They would be so busy from now on. Far too busy for anything Hop had to say. It only made sense, after all, if his own brother couldn't make the time for him, why should they when they still had each other?

"Y-yeah! Of course I know that, don't be so silly!" He waved her off with a laugh that left him feeling empty both inside and out.

"We _will_ miss you," Said Victor, placing a gentle hand on Hop's shoulder.

"I'm... I'm going to miss you guys too... Ah, but, you two shouldn't worry about me! I'll be fine, you know I'm always fine, aren't I?"

From the edge of the fence in his yard, Hop watched them walk away up the all too familiar dirt road. Victor, with his hands in his pockets, carried away with him all the adoration, admiration, and unbound kindness Hop had ever known another person to have. Gloria, with a spring in her step, stole away all the passion and spark, the fire, the brimstone, and all her nebula-esque beauty. And as they walked away, leaving the floating notes of a conversation Hop could hear but not understand, he tried to accept that he would have to let somethings go; whether or not he actually wanted to.

Hop would be the first person to admit there were lots of things he didn't know yet. Things about life, about himself, about the world. He also would admit, that no matter how desperately he chased after knowing, there would always be somethings he couldn't understand. One thing he did know however---or at least, one thing he _thought_ he knew---was that growing up came with more disappointment and heartache than most would ever admit.

It was something he learned from having a brother he didn't actually know off of the TV screen. So many moments of his life were filled with wishing from every corner of his soul that Leon was there with him, or that his mother wasn't glued to her own TV set. For every one of these moments, Hop learned to let a little more go.

It started with small things, as all things begin. His expectations, his dependency on others. Of course, as with all things, it didn't just end there.

It was when wishing turned to prayers, turned to unanswered begging and pleading that it happened. Hop began to give up on other things, on everything. Until, somewhere along the line of all the years gone by, he gave up on hoping and dreaming too.

And as gut-wrenching, sickening realization hit him, Hop crumpled to his knees. Maybe it didn't really matter if he ever saw them again. Either way the twins walking away from him weren't _his_ Victor and Gloria anymore. They were Victor and Gloria, of that there could be no doubt, and yet, somehow, they weren't the people he had grown up making memories with.

They were not his Victor and his Gloria anymore, and maybe they never would be again. Than again, maybe Hop was different now too, maybe he just didn't know he'd changed.

Was that why this was happening to him? Was that why he was going to be alone all over again? Because he was different now?

Before Hop ever met the twins, he spent most of his time with Wooloo and Sonia---on the rare occasions that the ginger wasn't busy, that is. Even if Dubwool and his boss were good company though, he knew it would never be the same.

Just to keep the tears in, Hop tipped his head back. A blue sky rolled endlessly above him, dotted with traveling white clouds. Despite his best efforts though, tears still came rolling down his cheeks.

Those clouds were just fluffy, silver-lined reminders of times long past. Of lying in the grass with Wooloo and talking on the phone with Victor and Gloria about the shapes they saw in the clouds above their homes. It just made him think that they would never be looking at the same clouds again.

"Why did you have to take them both?" He asked the unyielding sky in a voice that was weak, that was broken and cracking with the unstoppable onslaught of his tears. "Y' could've just taken _one_ of them---and that would be just fine because than I'd know---I'd know which one I could tell all these _stupid_ feelings to! Why--- _why?!_ Why not take me and spare them a life they don't know that they don't want! Why couldn't you just wait until I figured out how to tell them---Couldn't you just wait until I can learn how not be alone without them..."

The sky, the cosmos, who or whatever might've been listening had no answers for the weeping boy. There was just a cloud rolling in to block out the sun. Hop didn't notice the sudden darkening of the world around him, his vision too blurry with tears, and the unease roiling in his stomach had already painted the world in dull shades of gray. The aching in his gut however, was nothing compared to his bleeding heart and racing thoughts.

In his mind, Hop was drawing lines across Galar. As if it might actually soothe him to remember the distance between Wyndon and Postwick. However, there was nothing comforting about the thought of the two people he loved most being on the opposite end of the region as him.

All it did was make him think that there was so much more about those two he should've been paying attention to. Made him think that he should've realized a long time ago that their eyes weren't the color of mud or dirt, but of sweet toffee candy. Made him think that distance between people could only ever end poorly.

It just made him think that distance forced so much to go unsaid, that distance always left someone feeling sad and empty.

Because the only reason Hop wanted to be the Galarian champion in the first place, was so that Leon would come home.

Life had a funny way of working out like that. Hop wasn't the champion, and Leon still wasn't coming home---when he asked about it, his older brother just belted out a hearty laugh before explaining that he would be going to live with Raihan in Hammerlocke. And now, the only other people he confided in would be leaving too.

Hop never had a chance at beating Leon, or any other champion at this rate. It was a fact he'd known before setting off on his gym challenge in the first place. It was why he asked Sonia, the day before he boarded the first train to Motostoke, to let him come work for her when he returned.

And it was why he had no more tears to cry about it when he watched Gloria and Victor accept their new titles from the older brother he so desperately wished to know. And it was why he decided to scream his lungs out cheering for them instead.

Championship was a dream he let go a long time ago. A dream he had been ready to lose from the start. Hop just wasn't prepared to have to abandon all his other dreams at the exact same time.

Not that Hop ever assumed he had a chance with either of the twins. Gloria had vast goals and dreams that were completely beyond him, and the rest of the world entirely, and he had no intention of getting in her way. Victor, on the other hand, was simply someone too sweet, too kind, quiet, and soft for Hop to drag him down into his own stormy miseries.

Not that Hop ever assumed it would be possible to love either of the twins. No, they were far too alike for that. He would never be able to look into their eyes, or see their smile, or hear them laugh without thinking of the other one. Without seeing the other in the subtleties, in the flecks of honey-golden in their candied toffee eyes. Without thinking of what might have been.

He just never thought he'd lose them too. The twins were there for his every lonely moment. For each time he was wishing for Leon, they were there. Maybe he'd just grown so used to them always being there, that he never thought to imagine the day they wouldn't be.

Than again, it's not like he wanted to admit that he'd never get to hold her hand, or kiss him, or hold either of them. He didn't even want to admit it to himself. It's not like he, or anyone really, wanted to admit that he was going to be alone for, who knew how long?

It's not like Hop wanted to admit that the twins were tearing his heart apart one more time, to make room for all the miles between Postwick and Wyndon. It's not like he wanted to admit it, but it was all true.


End file.
